@#$%^ chemistry

wat the shit lah!!!! chem was screwed inside out and outside in... the paper was supa dupa difficult... i realli realli realli regretted being so complacent over chem.. it was like.. i dun do tutorial.. i dun listen in lect... ( rather i slp in it) and i dun listen to ms koh.. no wonder she dun like me... (i think).... wat the hell.. now its crewed.. gone liao lah...

I noe lah.. its just prelims rite? i shldnt be too bothered.. but hello!!!! i didnt take s paper for nothing lah.. i realli do want t scholarship... its a very small part for the money, but it will be great for my career lah.. and my CV will be fantastic and i probably get more responsibility and opportunities... sigh.. now its kinda blown up in smoke... becos of chem, i probably cant get 4 As... and argh.. i wasnt confident for econs anyway.. so now down to 2 As... take wat shitty scholarship lah... probably take one of those GLC scholarships in sembcorp or keppel.. if i can... PSC... FIREFLY... ASTAR.. DSTA... i will see u some other time bah...

For some gd nes now? Well, at least it took some pressure off of me... i noe that i can handle pressure lah.. but beta without then with in this case... oh well.. maybe i will do beta if i give up on scholarships... hahaha... ironic... oh more gd news... i got A for maths paper 1!!!!! yippee man!!! thats like a great morale booster for me man.. helped me for econs i must say i didnt brood over chem after i heard of maths.. so yah ok lah.. econs i cant say that i didnt do well becos i was upset over chem lah.. lol... now just hoping that for Maths paper 2, i wont badly for it lah... pls pls pls dont let even maths go out the window... pls...

Yah i was wondering why the sch must set paper until so difficult... to punish those ppl who are not woken up ah? then its like not fair to ppl who do lah... LIKE ME!!! the paper is difficult so that ppl who are smart confirm can do well, but ppl who are hard working but not smart cant... LIKE ME!!! thats not entirely fair yah? not to me at least so i can just go kill myself lah.. stupid sch.. argh!!! work my butt off to make my grades average... sharks... nvm.. lets just go thrg this and see how lah...

ok.. finally i must say two things.. firstly, i today thicken that thin skin on my face and asked mr lim to let me do the SEF for pts lah.. its kinda like a betraying... but aiyah.. my interests sometimes must come first rite? so yah... in a way, i know he will probably suan me lah.. but it does show that i'm not that proud to keep my pride checked in a hotel and locked up... Secondly and very importantly... i must reali take the time to thx god... he was the true person who has seen me thrg... i noe that no matter what result i have, he has a plan for me lah... whether i get a scholarship or not, i noe that in the end, i will get where i wanna be.. just that it will be a wee bit harder thats all... but its ok... i can endure.. and i will survive... and his plan for me... will nto fail because i made it fail.... thats all i wanna say... NITEZ